another kind of me

Think of them as thoughtlets.
(but what are they really?)

For the week of october 26, 1997

tuesday, october 28, 1997, 22:16

Something about the best laid plans...
Woke up this morning to see pico still open with the blank new another. Oh well, I guess sleep wins out on that one.
In my never ending quest for happiness, I've come to a few conclsions. Or at least I think I have. I've found that the problem with event based happiness is that once it's over, you crash down again and realize that you were happy for a moment, but that the moment's passed.
This comes about after a really, get this, fun, weekend. That's right. I actually got out and had fun. Friday went to look at an apartment for next year. Hope everything works out with that, but with my luck and all that. Right. I suppose we'll just have to wait and see. That night I just stayed at home, watched some anime. Nice and relaxing, and I got some sleep. Saturday, early morning things at the theatre, as always, and then I really have no recollection of the rest of the day.
Until that night, that is.
That night ranks up there with one of the most fun nights. Hrm, actually, it was a little different. Not quite of the same caliber as, say, the kommie strike night where we packed up an entire production, brought it up the hill and plunked it down in our theatre for a 2 am production. And not quite the same as that cast party earlier in the semester.
This was a different kind of happy. More just as a release. The Might Be Giants concert. Opening band was pretty good (lincoln), but tmbg was basically just an hour and a bunch (almost 2) of jumping around. Large conga lines. Feeling like there was absolutely no oxygen left around for me to breath. Thinking about passing out but knowing that i could just stick it out for a bit longer.
listenlistenlisten. jumping up, with the crowd, looking at the tops of the heads of all those around. I don't know, really can't capture the feeling of the concert. It was really just a release of all the energy that I had pent up all semester.
And then back up the hill, back home to a party. Party was also a lot of fun. Not really a party-goer, but there were a lot of my friends there. And boy these words aren't coming out right now. Oh well. To get these words down. That's all. Yeah.
Party? People were there. That's about all I have to say about it. Did some dancing to some bad techno / rap crap, but that just didn't go so well. It just didn't feel right to me.
But getting back to that whole happiness thing. Once everything was done and I was walking away from the party, thinking about the evening, everything was fine. Knowing that I had fun at the concert, that was good. And the experience was good. But once that was done, i had nothing to fall back on. I didn't have any happiness to come down to.
No baseline. And I went back to neutral.
Granted, neutral isn't bad, but it isn't good either.
Oh well, beggers can't be choosers and all.
Time for more fun. Time for theatre meeting. I suppose that's it them. Keep having one fun thing after another and there'll be no time to come back down to neutral.
Boy. That could get exhausting.
(speaking of exhausting, did i mention the segmented meeting we had on sunday? the one that started at noon and lasted, on and off until about 7:45? no? i didn't think so. repression and all that. you know, sometime, i really don't know what i'm doing on that board. i've always been, and always will be, "the tech guy," regardless of what i say. i'll say something non-tech related, and it'll be ignored. *sigh* typecasting. lifecasting.)