ignore
march 11, 1997 19:25


i hate being ignored.

seems like a pretty obvious thing, but it really bugs me. i suppose that it's the environment that i'm in. and i suppose that i really have to learn to suck it up. computer science is not friendly, unless you know the right people, and they like you. if you can prove that you're not a complelete idiot and if you can prove that you've got some sort of knowledge, then you're golden.

these days, hoever, i've been getting the cold shoulder. I'd like to believe that it's because the people that i ask want me to become independent, want me to learn on my own, want me to not depend on the help of others.

But there are more productive ways of doing so than ignoring me. My whole life's been spent wanting to be a part of something. Do i ever quite achieve that? Am i really a part of whatever it is that's going on in this crazy world?

pshaw. just had to get that off my chest. i feel better already. their loss, not mine, right? bullshit. who do i think i'm fooling?

myself, obviously.

jcn@brown.edu


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