thursday, january 7, 1999, 03:16 after getting through the beginnings of a redesign of the Lauan Records web page, which i've been telling myself that i've wanted to do for a while, i decided that the redesign is total crap. due both to the lack of photoshopping skills and the fact that i've not been motivated enough to do anything lately, i just looked and realized that the site was boring, visually bland, and cluttered. take two. i've finally taken steps to join the world of high society and actually went out today, with my mother no less, to buy myself a suit. and i even ended up with one. a nice three button, dark grey suit, all trimmed to my length leg and everything. and the whole way home, i was asking myself why i did it? do i really need a suit? cries of "sellout!" rang out in my head. but then again, what's wrong with a suit? it's clothes. it looks nice. and now, for that big date of mine, which i just know is coming up, which is going to require me to look all dressy like, i'll be all set. now all i need are shoes. take three. i completed, after too many days, aol.com, by kara swisher, about the history of america online. if nothing else, it gave me insight into the mindset surrounding those at a startup company. from reading that, and watching a booktv (on cspan2... mmm... cspan2) coverage of an astronaut/artist, i've realized that i want to be around that kind of energy. the kind of energy that surrounds a company which is out to prove to the world that it's got something worth while. everybody working on the apollo missions felt like they were part of the mission. everyone at aol felt like they were part of the company, that they were doing something that was really worth their time. i will not waste away in a company that i am not with 100%. there's just not enough time for that. finale. i'm getting my wisdom teeth out in a day or so. i'm going back to school in a week. classes start in three. they end sometime after that. before then i'll have to do a bit more theatre. and write some more stories. and live some more life. i didn't make any new year's resolutions. i never can seem to come up with anything that i want to do, nor can i remember them after the fact. but for myself, i'd like to try to become a nicer person. i'd like to burden fewer people with my problems. i'd like to be more outgoing. and i'd like to have more fun, and less worries. and i suppose i'd like to graduate as well.
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