third annual new york city playwrights festival
at theatre-studio, inc.
september 1 and 3, 1999. 8pm.At least I think that's where it was. It was one of the least memorable pieces of theatre I've ever seen. Okay, so the evening actually got better once we got past the first piece of "theatre," but that first one was a real stinker, and i think it dampened the mood of the entire evening.
There were four pieces performed that night. The first one should have been titled "You know what I hate? This play." Picture four folding chairs set up behind a steering wheel taped to a microphone stand. Picture a man sittin in the "driver's seat" and imagine listening to Somewhere Over the Rainbow performed by, who was it, James Taylor? No, that can't be right. Anyway, picture an over exaggerated miming of getting into the car by another man into the passenger's seat. imagine the driver miming the ignition and turning the steering wheel. does this sound boring yet? at least you didn't have to watch it. now imagine the rest of the play taking place on the road on the way to work with commentary about how old people can't drive. and how women can't drive. and how "You know what I hate? Construction workers." Imagine this and a donut, and you've pretty much got the gist of the story.
Imagine this and imagine it happening three more times after this one. Imagine having to sit through all of it and realizing that it was not over and imagine not being able to openly mock the bad acting and poor (if there was any at all) directing because that's not the kind of thing you're supposed to do at the theatre.
Maybe I've just been spoiled by the things that I've seen up at school, but in all honesty, there were no redeeming factors at all to this show. It was a bad script, being performed by bad actors who were directed badly. Why it was even allowed to go up is beyond me.
This was the first piece of the festival. While the other three were arguably better, having this piece first pretty much ruined the evening for me. The second piece was directed by a friend of mine, and would have been enjoyable had it not been for the fact that the script was rife with cliches and mysogyny as only a man who has had some awful experiences with women in the past can write. The acting and directing were as good as could have been given the script, but at times it was like watching the captain go down with the ship. There really was nothing that could have been done to help it. And then there was the question of why wife was wearing body glitter. But I think that was a choice that we will all just have to live with and not question.
The third piece involved nudity of the male variety which came really close to just being gratuitous but in the end I think made a valid point. It was, in fact, a fairly well written piece about an art student in a locker room and the ensuing conversation between said student and the hockey player she encoutners. It, like the other shows thus far, had its fair share of "bitch!" comments and the hockey player "i'm bigger than you" power play over the art student. but when it came down to it, the tables were turned, she had the upper hand, and he was left standing there, naked. Nice ending, and an amusing curtain call at which point the hockey player tried to cover himself up with his underwear.
The fourth piece was hilarious. A cozy dinner for two, an obnoxious waiter, or was he an arabian prince, a sword fight, some pop psychobabble stuff and the woman's date lying dead on the floor after he tried to analyze her supposed rape fantasy. Ok, so it doesn't sound as funny as it was. This show made the entire festival worthwhile. I just wish I didn't have to sit through the first two to get to it.