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Saturday June 03, 2000, 03:15

i spent the night looking through their window. well, not the whole night, but much of the night. and now he's there, beer bottles on the window sill. brown brown. green. brown brown. green green. and a wine bottle. he's wearing a wife-beater. god, what an awful name for a shirt.

i can't tell whan he's doing. is the sink there? he's looking very intently at something, but it's down below where i can see from here. he's smoking.

there were four of them, friends from college perhaps, and they were standing around the kitchen, drinking beer. green. brown. green green. brown. and i spent most of the time staring at her back. the sand colored dress with thin straps over a white tanktop, also with thin straps. the straps falling all the time and having to be adjusted. slipped back up over the shoulder.

i had almost considered going out tonight, going out with noah whom i haven't seen since, well, last night, but before then, hadn't seen since i'd left iturf. but as i was walking home, and i knew it before it happened. as i was walking home, as i saw the dark clouds rolling i, the air starting to cool. as i was walking home, the sky opened up and i got rained on.

and hard.

the rain flew sideways. my umbrella was useless. and i didn't even care. it had been a long day at work, i was hot and sticky and tired. and this was a welcome, welcome break. it was wet. it was cool. my shoes squished (still do for that matter).

i finally got home and stripped in my foyer. i couldn't even get my socks off as they had magically bonded to my feet. a shower later and i was not leaving the apartment again for the rest of the night. well, except to get a movie. i had an uncontrollable desire to see good will hunting today. don't know where it came from, don't know what prompted it. had to see it.

so i did. and i did with the sounds of the kids across the alley with their windows open, the girls on the fire escape smoking and talking, the eclectic (read: awful) music blasting, in the background.

but the night. friday night. on the couch. on the computer. watching the movie. responding to email. doing not nearly enough other work that i should have been doing. thinking about applying to design a show that's going on up here in september. thinking that i know nothing about Mamet and that I should brush up a bit. thinking that today should have might have been the last straw at work but still have not acted up this theory.

i sat on my butt tonight and watched a glowing box in one form or another. and i made macaroni and cheese. i actually messed it up. i must have put in too much milk or something. i ate a bowl of it and felt sick. or full. or both. not because of the milk. just. because.

i sat on my butt tonight and watched a glowing box.

not too shabby.

also, was awoken this morning by some jerkoff leaning on his car horn at 7am.

also, mish complained that there were no pictures of her on my site, but then neglected to send me any. the nerve.

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